WORK STORY: Powerball, French, Whistling and hilarious video

Not a long blog today, if you do nothing else…watch the video…this is what i saw from inside the store…music was playing INSIDE…not outside..omg LMAO!!! (yes…you will hear me giggling)

Powerball- Nuff said…everybody entertained their thoughts of winning a ridiculous amount of money…including me…my personal agenda would take care of my friends, some family,  my caboholic family and lots and lots of scholarships…oh…. and a yacht =)

French- 3 French Canadians came in…exercised my dusty skills…they were not impressed…lol…MERDE!

Whistling- My Nana who immigrated from the UK always said, “People who whistle, are the ones who cannot sing, but express the happiness in their heart by whistling, you can always trust a whistler”…lol…so a gentleman , must have been in his 60′s , maybe early 70′s? came in whistling to the song on the radio…”No Doubt” was playing…. WTF?!?!?!?! He was whistling in tune on every note….to “No Doubt” !!!!!! And it was the opera type whistling…holy hell I was impressed!!! I said…”Thank you for whistling!!!”…he said, “I was?”…to which I laughed and said “Sir, yes….yes you were, and I get it it, apparently I sing, dance and snap to music that I am unaware of.”…he winked, and was on his way.

Water Festival this weekend….good time for a car wash with all the tourists that come thru…one of our local banks(right across the street form the store) allows their space for this….Music is playing INSIDE the store…not OUTSIDE…i almost peed myself laughing at this kid…you can hear me giggling…this kid rocked it out trying to get cars…A+, little man, A+ !!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=deuiLh3Vx5o

WORK STORY: Oh Deer, ROXY, Poodles and Jiggles & Happy Birthday

ROXY- Got to babysit my canine niece again today…oh how i LOVE this little pint sized pup, and I love so much that my boss trusts me with her…she was sleepy after we played…lol

Jiggles- Gentleman came in, brought his stuff to counter, “Moves Like Jagger” came on the radio. Apparently not only do I sing and snap, but I dance too. With NO flippin clue that I’m doing it. As he hands me his money, he says, “Don’t stop jiggling…”…I said “Pardon me?”…he says, “Don’t stop dancing, keep on jiggling!”…OK I may have been tapping my foot, but I sure as hell wasn’t  doing the cabbage patch or anything…and jiggling? WTF does THAT mean?

Poodles- BEST POODLES….EVER….look for yourself…nuff said

HAPPY BIRTHDAY- I love this gal…seriously , she is the neatest lady!!! She has been so supportive of me, just love her… Lots of Moxy this one….I said HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! She says, “It’s not my birthday until July”……LMAOOOO…she gave me permission to put this in my blog…

it was pouring rain out, hence the spots on her shirt….i swear i did not spit on her lol

 

Oh Deer- I was putting boxes away out back and saw this deer casually strolling through the parking lot, I knew it was headed straight for the road (our main one, hence it being called Main St lol)….snapped the pic…and ran out to road to stop traffic…I walked right out on to Main St like a crossing guard ninja,in pouring rain, held both arms out to stop traffic both ways, and the deer made it safely across….no thank you, no “see ya later”…just kept on going….you are welcome deer

WORK STORY: Slingblade, Guitar Picks, Singing, Glitter for Ass Cancer, Odd Cat & Doggy story

Slingblade- I wore my “to write love on her arms” shirt today, it just says in big white letters…”LOVE” …first customer of the day comes in…he is a regular and bit of an odd duck…today he came in talking like Billy Bob Thorton in Slingblade…(WTF dude…stop…you’re creeping me out)..he just walked around store grunting and talking…he finally comes up to the counter and as i tell him the total, he grunts again and says…”MmmmHmmmm….okay…mmmhmmm…and I want a shirt that says LOATHE not LOVE…Mmmmhmmmm”…What the…..

Guitar Picks: Customer came in and gave me 3 picks for my daughter who plays bass…2 of them had grippy things on them…very cool =)

Singing: The song “Lego House” by Ed Sheeran came on…I love this song as it reminds me of my daughter Demi…a much much older gentleman was at the counter writing his check (maybe early 80′s?)…he hands me his check , looks at me and says, “You have a beautiful voice young lady!”….I almost fell over, as I did not realize I was singing…I wonder if I sing a lot? I replied, “Thank you…for calling me young lady …that made my day!”….now I am really wondering how much I sing? Because I really was not even aware that I was…my boss says a snap a lot too…have no clue i’m even doing it….she will randomly yell “Snappy SNAPPY!”…lol

Glitter for Ass Cancer: My dear and beautiful friend Amanda came in and got her blood orange soda, she told me a long time ago that if she won the lottery, she wanted spend whatever it took  to drop glitter bombs in the middle east…LOL!! (my friends are the bestest…EVER) She loves her glitter, today she brought some in to show me…and she gave me one packet…the blue/teal one…

I was racking my brain trying to think how and who I could put glitter on…and then it hit me…My girl who has ass cancer…when she came in with her hubby…I threw glitter at her ass…why? healing love glitter to eliminate cancer…duh…even threw some at him for preventative measures…

ODD Cat & Doggy Story: Customer comes in…shows me video of how he has trained his cat to sit….no joke…this cat sits…on command, not whenever it feels like it LOL!

Another customer comes in, I was covered in Roxy’s dog hair…we were discussing that, and then he says, “I was literally covered in dog yesterday…like literally…19 cocka-poo puppies…we were doing their dew-claws and the trick is using super glue…so yeah, i got super glued to a 5 day old puppy…”…omg lmaoooooo

Again, I love my job, and I love that people feel comfortable sharing their lives with me…I am honored.

 

Mother’s Day Story; Special Song(video), really expensive tea, surprise egg salad!!!, magic garden, and my gift

Song: My girls decided to sing a song they made up for me…we are a very musical family afterall…somehow I think this one may have been last minute…still awesome…and notice Ziggy trying to protect Savanna after her cries/barking…he’s like…I GOT YOU…lol

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEUT6TdIpQk

EXPENSIVE TEA!!!- Went to the grocery store to get salad stuff and some drinks…let me stress the word “some”…not 316…lmaooooo

Surprise Egg Salad- I love egg salad! One of the gals who works at the Knead & Feed on my street, comes to my work once in awhile, I adore her, we joke about egg salad all the time, as she makes it at the restaurant. So my girls and I went for a stroll this afternoon, they wanted to stop at the Knead & Feed. My gal sees me and says…”I have egg salad! I’m going to make you half a sandwich!”..me- “OMG YAY!!!!!”…not only does she make me a FULL egg salad sandwich, pickle included, she hands me a white rose and says, “Happy Mother’s Day”…how lucky am I? By the way, the Knead & Feed is the same place that was used in the movie “Practical Magic” as their little shop. Here I am with my special sanny, rose and rocking my Johnny Cash t-shirt on Momma’s Day

Magic Garden- When I moved to the island 14yrs ago, there is a house a couple blocks down on my street we would pass on our walks. I instantly thought of the “Secret Garden” first time I saw it, but decided to call it the “Magic Garden”…for 14yrs I have made all of my girls, now my grandbabies, and my BFF & her kids, stop and make a wish at the gate. It is mandatory. It has become a habit, like brushing your teeth or taking out the garbage, when we walk by, we stop at the gate, and make a wish. I made a very special wish today =)

Gift from my girls :Anyone who knows me, knows I love my offspring deeply fiercely and with all my might. I may not be your average Mom, from taking them to concerts, meeting their favorite bands, to making wishes at our neighbors yard,  loving critters passionately, exposing them to music,helping them discover their own voice ( even if it pushes them away from me), loving and laughing hard…i would take a bullet for each and every one of them. I love that they did not choose just any word to describe me…lol…to my sunshine dancer, rainbow dancer, star dancer, and puddle dancer…i love you to the moon and back, forever and always infinite…PS. One of the cards says “Haircut money” and the other “Flower money”…

 

 

WORK STORY: Being Serenaded, Tattoos, Bonus “Roxy”, Handywoman & A Bit of Life thrown in

Serenaded by the lotto guy- A much older gentleman comes in just for lotto stuff. He has been helping me with little bits of spanish, he’s adorable. Anyway, very thick spanish accent, always laughing and smiling, and promises if he wins the “big one” he is giving me 1 million dollars, so we should all bow our heads and pray now, that he wins! LOL Anyway, always have music on at the store. He oftens hums along, sometimes dances a bit as I check his tickets. Well today the song “Give me just a reason” by Pink and Nate Ruess came on. I was singing along quietly, and he breaks into full blown humming and laalalala’ing, even the high notes…never in my life would i think I would have an old Hispanic man humming along with me to Pink!. I friggin LOVE IT!!!!

Tattoos: Customer came in, probably in his late 60′s, wearing a tank top. He has a big old black panther tattoo. Classic old school style. I commented, “Great tattoo!”…he laughs and says the story behind it is even better…. “My buddies and I were broke, had been eating boxed mashed potatoes all week, but we had enough for booze and to get a tattoo. My one buddy was a little tipsy and started swaying a bit when he got his, he went to the bathroom…all we heard was a CLINK!…he had fallen and hit his head on the sink…thing is, he has a metal plate in his head and that’s the CLINK we heard”…me- “OMG was he OK?”…customer- “Hell yes, we laughed our asses off!”…me- “That is an awesome tattoo story!!! Totally sharing it on my blog!”

ROXY- I wasn’t expecting Miss Roxy today, but boss lady popped by and dropped her off for a bit so she could run some errands with her daughter. ( I like to secretly hope that she did because she knew I was missing her lol)…anyway, after being at the farmers market, Roxy was tuckered out! I carried her over to the other computer so I could do some paperwork with the intention of her laying in my lap. She fell fast asleep before I even got to the chair, her head on my shoulder, so it only made sense to let her stay there …right?

 

Jenn…the Handywoman- Toilet seat was jiggly…I fixed it…that is all…go me!

Life- I am still  a little surprised at what customers will share with me, but I feel honored that they do. They tell me things they haven’t even told family. I do not, will not, ever share the private things. I’m not sure why they do…but I will say I have hugged more people in the past 8mths, who genuinely need one, than I have in the past 5yrs (probably more). I have seen death, illness, loss of jobs/pets, marriage,divorce, love, new babies, new pets, new jobs. I love my job…why? Because of all the things I listed. I’m seeing life everyday, the good,bad and the ugly. It is teaching me…My goal has always been to make everyone smile, laugh if possible. I am 100% successful on getting people to smile….my theory is this…i ALWAYS smile…a god damn genuine smile…and you know what? They are contagious……..if you sport a full on genuine smile at someone, they will smile back. Try it…

 

WORK STORY: Arrogant Frog, My Doily Top & Surprises From Friends

Before I begin this, my goal today, was to give each customer a genuine compliment. I was about 75% successful. The 25% that did not receive one, was for one of two reasons, 1) They left before I could come up with one or 2) i forgot…lol…it’s not as easy as you might think, especially grumpy customers (but i managed to compliment a couple of those!!!)

Arrogant Frog- Customer comes in, I say , “Hello! How are you today?”…his response- “If I were any better, I might have to take some back!”…best response I have heard in ages!!! He sees a bottle of wine we have called “Arrogant Frog” and then tells me this, ” I had a guy from Paris work for me once, I bought this bottle of wine for him. He didn’t appreciate it as much as I did.”…hahahahahaha!!!! This guy was great! I complimented him on his amazing red sweater =)

Doily Top- I have a new favorite top, my girlfriend and her husband come in and she says, “Cute top!” …me-”Thank you, I love it!”….him-”You look like a doily”….lmao wtf? There were 2 pink ribbon thingys on each shoulder and no matter what I did, they kept popping out as you can see in pic….so my gal Madonna kindly cut them off for me….wardrobe adjustments from customers are normal, right? lol

 

Surprises- My friend Sara made a post on facebook, it was a photo of the sweet rolls she had made. I commented, “Nice buns babe” or something like that….today her hubby brought me a plate…SCORE!!!!!!!! Omg they are good!

My wonderful neighbor of 14yrs, Linda, came in and brought me these beautiful flowers from her garden and said, “We love you and the girls so much.” I was deeply touched, the lilacs are making the liquor store smell divine, they come home with me tomorrow. =) I am truly blessed with some wonderful people in my life…that is an easy thing to take for granted sometimes, and then things like this happen to smack you upside the head and remind you…THANK YOU SARA & MATT…love you much!!!!! Your buns made my day =)

WORK STORY & Photo of “As I Lay Dying” (in the news right now)- Love at first sight, Toilet Jokes, and Murder For Hire

I believe in love at first sight…and today at work, I fell in love. I don’t even know what made me turn around, but I was serving a customer and just felt the need to look. Holy hell, my heart skipped a beat…..!!! It was a fairly slow day, and my boss just happened to be there as it got busy. I could barely concentrate. Gentleman comes up to the counter…I ask him, “Were your driving the convertible?”…him- “Yes” as he smiles brightly….me- “Oh my GAWD!!! I’m in love!! I wish I could take a picture!!!”…..I was giddy….my boss looks at me and says, “Go on then, I’ll help these people, go take your picture.”…I’m pretty sure I was so excited that I may have skipped lol…love is a splendid thing!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Customer told me it was a Shelby Cobra, my friend (car expert) said it is a 1967, probably a replica as it would be worth 1-1.5 million if it was real. I don’t care what it’s worth, replica or not….I FELL HEAD OVER HEELS!!!!…sigh…..

Toilet Jokes- The toilet at work would sometimes keep running…(fixed now)…everytime i saw the note (on left), i would giggle at  first thought, so i finally replied…yes, I may be a bit of a smartass…good thing my boss is OK with that…lol

Not sure if you have heard this in the news, but the lead singer of As I Lay Dying (Christian Metal Band) was charged for hiring someone to murder his estranged wife. I happened to do a photo shoot with them a few years ago…just shows…you never know…he is  2nd from left

WORK STORY: DOGS!!!!!! , Catfish & Samesies and an “Oopsie daisies ” wardrobe malfunction caused by Miss Roxy

DOGS- Yep…the stars of today’s work story are almost ALL dogs…lol!  My daughter brought her 2 in today, “Bobby and Dobie”…It seems Miss Roxy has decided to be a bit protective of her Aunt a bit…as I was holding her, she gave a warning growl to Bob and Dobie….lol

My friend Angela brought her dog by too…never seen anything like it before…he is a beagle/cattle dog mix…but he’s more like a mr.potatoe head dog…he has the torso of a cattle dog, and then the head and tail of a beagle…it is pretty trippy…this is not photoshopped lol

My beautiful favorite golden retriever “Dolly” came for a visit too!!! For some reason I always want to break into song when I see her and start singing “Well hello Dolly….”…smiling nicely for me behind the counter

Ok time for a break from the doggies…Roxy’s story will come later…

 

CATFISH- My daughters went to the farmer’s market today and hand delivered the most delicious catfish sandwich to me….talk about YUMMMMM…my tummy was pleased =) I may, or may not have shared a wee bit with Dobie, Bob and Roxy…

 

SAMESIES- My friend Angela came by today (as stated earlier with mr.potato head dog), we have really become good friends, I adore her. One of the things we often giggle about is how similar we are…tons in common, she is the one who brought all the cd’s in for me to burn…first time we met she said, “OMG…I have the same pair of glasses as you!!!”…me-”NO way!!!”….I guess she was telling the truth…

ROXY & The Oopsie Daisies- Boss lady was not originally going to golf today, but she told me this morning I got to have my niece dog again! I was so flipping excited!! My daughter said, “Mom, there is something wrong with you.”…lol..(boss lady had one of her best golf days ever…see? it’s a good thing I begged to babysit again). Let me just say, I have never fallen so in love with someone else’s dog…never happened…I love MY dogs only…kinda like kids…I love mine…yours are a pain in the ass…ok back to Miss Roxy…I was entering stuff in the computer, so this is when i made a little hammock out of my top so she could be in my lap…she loved it

During one quiet point, I was walking through store and making it proper, I thought I would hold her while I did that….she fell fast asleep…it’s almost like she is smiling while she is sleeping…I really don’t snuggle her that much, I promise, but when boss lady AND her hubby say Roxy smells like me, I might be a little bit busted…hey I get my work done…lol

OOPSIES!- Roxy has this weird habit of sticking her paw down your top…I thought it was a fluke at first, but boss lady says she does it with her too almost like she is saying “You cannot put me down if I anchor my foot here”…lol…so I was holding her when a a regular customer came in…customer wants to see Roxy, so I walk over…customer says, “Umm Jenn?”…me- “Yes?”….customer- “Roxy is trying to show off your boobs I think.”…I look down, sure enough, Roxy’s paw is pushing my top down, the ladies, while not fully exposed, were right out there(more like a lot of cleavage showing)…thank GOD i was wearing a tank top underneath and that this customer was female!…I would have been mortified had it been anyone else!!!!…I look at Roxy and say, “You sassy girl!” apologize to customer and then sheepishly pull my top up…and that, my friends, was my Janet Jackson moment…!!!

 

WORK STORY: Shoe Man, Girls Afternoon, My eyeborw piercing…and precious Roxy

SHOE MAN- It was a little slow, so i was breaking down some boxes and putting some in the back outside. I look over to the  apartment parking lot adjacent to us. This guy is taking grass clippings and rubbing his hands with them and making them fall. OK???….then he takes off his shoes. Holds one shoe in each hand and walks around the parking lot. Then he stops and examines each shoe…smelling it, looking closely at it. Finally he just stands there with a shoe in each hand. I was like WHOA this dude is tripping…BAD. My ninja cell phone photo, doesn’t quite give this bizarre behavior justice. But he was mesmorized by his shoes lol…

<a GIRLS Afternoon- My youngest daughter came by for a visit, then boss lady showed up to pic up her baby, then 2 of my island BFF's showed up, then one of my fav lady customers came in…all i can say was it was loud, happy and glorious!!! Not work like at all!!! Store was full of amazing women and it made my day =)

Eyebrow Piercing- Second time this has happened. Older lady coms in and stares at me and says, ” How do you get those things to stick to your eye?”…me- i point to my eyebrow, “This?”….her- “Yes…how do you get them to stay?”…me- “It’s a piercing.”…she leans in closer, so i show her how it moves and it is attached…I half expected a negative comment…her- “Oh, how silly of me, that’s quite lovely, did it hurt?”…me- “No and thank you…you should get one.”…her- “Im too old for that sort of thing, I wish I could, I really like it.”…me- “You’re never too old.”…She gave me a lovely smile and left.

ROXY- So apparently I have fallen head over for my boss’s dog. I’m really not a small dog person, even though I have a pug…but pugs are like mini mastiffs…lol…i am a mastiff girl. But this little missy has won my heart. I adore her. Crap pic of me …but adorable one of her . Aunty Jenn loves you Miss Roxy!!!

WORK STORY: “Roxy”, Peeping Tom, Crazy Lady & Hippie

ROXY- My boss rescued Roxy. This precious girl was abandoned so of course the universe knew that she must come all the way from CA to WA to be with my boss. Crazy thing is, I have become a little obsessed with this baby. I seriously ADORE her! My daughter dislikes most animals with the exception of our bullmastiff “Ziggy” and now “Roxy”. Roxy is a bit shy and timid in the beginning…not with Savanna…miss dog hater lol. They bonded immediately. Savanna came in today and Roxy got so excited!!!And then this happened..

Personally, when I get to babysit, it’s like getting a Christmas bonus! My clothes usually give me away that I like snuggling her (fur lol)…do i care? Hell no!…today i was sitting in the chair at desk writing something down, I swivel the chair and see this….she wanted in my lap

 

so of course then THIS happened…lol

 

PEEPING TOM- Customer comes in to buy a couple packs of cigarettes….finish ringing him up and he says, “Ummm there is a guy staring at you through the window.”…I turn around and sure enough there is a man , face right up to window. WHAT THE HELL?? He says real loud…”Just looking at your tattoo!!!”…then gives me the thumbs up. I look at customer and he just shrugs his shoulders and then leaves and joins the guy…wtf……

CRAZY LADY- This woman comes in right as I open….probably in her 60′s and obviously a product of the 60′s. Dancing around the store, excited about every little new thing she sees. “Oh! Jameson!!! Oh look! Tequila!!! Oh what is this? What is Cognac? Moonshine? Oh how lovely!!!”…i just smiled…then she sees my tattoo …(i forget it’s there because it’s on my back)…”OH!!! Please let me see your tattoo!!!”…I show her…”Why are her lips sewn shut?”…i tried explaining but it got turned into her telling me how she worked for a hispanic family who spoke little english and she just smiled for 10mths not understanding what they said…lol…she left saying “OH…I love you Jenn!” …ok? =) she was adorable

HIPPIE- Dude comes in…long grey hair in a ponytail, wearing a “Legalize marijuana” t-shirt…never seen this guy before…he says, “How are you this fine day?”…me-”Just fabulous thanks, how about you?”….”Oh you know…work day is done, ready to get my buzz on and ride the lawn mower.”…this was at approximately noon…..I notice his arms are all bruised and cut up…one cut is still bleeding…he leans on the counter to look at Roxy. “Cute dog”…me- “Yes, she really is…that will be $5.02″….”You have a great spririt, I can tell. So good luck with your boyfriend!!! He’s  a lucky dude for sure! I will put a good word in with the boss for you!!!” …ok wait…WHAT??? I didn’t say I had a boyfriend? Good word with the boss? Ummm Ok?…he pays and leaves…another customer had come in and was about to place their stuff on the counter…i said “STOP!!! NO!!! WAIT please!”…ran to back, got 409, and proceeded to wipe the blood off the counter….customer did not see it, thank goodness!

 

typical thursday?  sorta lol